A '20 HAND' WHAT?

Ok, most of you have heard of a 21 gun salute, Billboard's top 20
tunes,  casino Blackjack 21 & even 20 blackbirds baked in some sort of dessert.


But I'll bet cash to krispy kreams that very few of you have ever heard of  - & even fewer have had the pleasure of experiencing -  the '20 Hand Duo Massage'.


But maybe you'd like to.


That '20' is the 'not so well publicized' brain child of Maui's Grand Wailea Resort's Spa Grande PR guys. It celebrates their 20th anniversary in the biz.


Basically, the 'duo' of 20HDM is you & your honey both enjoying a whopping 2 1/2 hour massage, via the 20 hands of 10 trained massage therapists.


Oooooh. My muscles are already relaxing. 


You each get 5 MTs working on different body parts (that's 10 hands per - for the math challenged). And they perform their digital magic all at the same time.


Can you even imagine?


The idea is that when you get a traditional massage, your brain concentrates on where the massager's hands are pushing, pulling & kneading. 


Not bad, right?


But when you multiple that by 5 pairs ppk-ing (at the very same time) all that stimulation overload confuses your noggin & makes it impossible to concentrate on any one spot.


The brain actually gives up trying to think & allows you to be totally immersed  in hedonistic relaxation. 


It could result in the 'ahhhhh' heard round the world.


Is this a deal you can't refuse or what?


Unfortunately there's always a 'what'. The price for this baby is a whopping 2,000 bucks. Broken down that's 100 smackers per MT hand & $20 per MT finger/thumb.


But that's for 2 people & includes the tip.


Look, these 10 guys have to practice giving a 20HDM at least once a week to be sharp on the 'palm to body' choreography. For 2000 big ones you wouldn't want them to be bumping into each other & interrupting your ecstatic flow, would you? 


So all 10 must move as smoothly & coordinated as a performance dance team.


Ok - before you all flood this resort with 'practice massage volunteer' applications - they only do rehearsals on a member of their own team. 


Hmmm. Kinda makes you want to go out & snag a MT license & a Maui plane pass, doesn't it? 


This service has been available since late summer (& will be offered 'til  December '12). Can you guess who has booked one of these sensual sessions? 


A movie star? Politician? A major financier? 


The answer is no one. 


That's right, even those in Donald Trump's tax bracket have passed on what could be the world's most extravagant dive into pure pleasure.   


So this opens it up for you & your sweetie to be the 1st.


I know, $2000 is a bit much, but give up your daily trip to Starbucks for 6 or so months & you might save that. Possibly more.


There ARE a few other ways of making you the recipient of the 1st paid  20 Hand Duo Massage, but I can't tell you any of them now.


I'm a little jumpy from giving up coffee & almost late for my initial massage therapist class.